Public Affection Depresses Singles

Spring has finally sprung! The weather is slightly warmer and I can see the sun for more than 2 hours before a storm hits. Spring is always associated with "love being in the air." Which I think is ridiculous. There is always love in the air. Everyone is shut in during the winter so you don't see as many people galloping about looking happy. Once the warm weather rises again, this forces those publicly flirty people to the outdoors to have fun activities. Like sitting on a blanket under a tree or riding a bike or whatever activities those types of hacks do on warm weather days.

In any case, this wears on single people to some degree. Watching all these young happy couples prance about, being flirty and affectionate while they sit and watch in both envy and disgust. My theory is, they just haven't seen publicly flirty couples for months because they have all been shut in for the winter. You'll see the occasional one or two. But not as often as around every street corner or every inch of a typical college campus. The single people almost forget what it's like. They eventually adapt in a couple of weeks and completely forget about how abundant flirty couples are in warm weather.

Nonetheless, every year, I never fail to hear at least 2 people a week complain about all the flirty people outside and how it makes them feel lonely and blah blah blah. Don't let a few saps make you feel lonely just because they appear to be having a good time. Feel lonely because a sibling stole your girlfriend/boyfriend, ran over your dog and murdered your best friend. That's lonely. Quit your whining. You'll forget all about it next week when you hear about how dysfunctional everyones new relationships are.

Love isn't in the air. I'll tell you what's in the air. Pollution. Lots of it. Take comfort in that or whine about it. That's more legit than starting a conversation with "Seeing all this love during spring time makes me feel [lonely, depressed, sad, hungry, whatever temporary emotion you are feeling at the time]. I hate Spring."

No, this isn't the funny blog I had planned. I may write that tomorrow. It's better than this one. We'll see. Work is busy. I'm tired and fat. You know, the usual excuses I use to not do something I should.