It's little secret that I'm a huge nerd. My passion for sci-fi and other types of cosmic fiction is boundless. Star Trek and Star Wars tend to be my favorites. But I remember Star Wars as my introduction into this realm of nerdiness.
Whether or not you're familiar with the original holy trilogy is not that concerning for this post. But it will probably help your understanding of my feelings a little bit.
The first Star Wars, A New Hope (episode 4, technically) was my introduction to the franchise. As a kid, it wasn't my favorite of the movies but I certainly did love it. I fell in love with the whole universe of Star Wars. The plot. The weapons. The legendary music track by John Williams. I wanted to know everything about the movie. The Empire Strikes Back, the second of the original series was my least favorite. It was too dark and scary for my little child brain to grasp. The heroes weren't supposed to lose or get hurt. All the stories I had ever known up until that point had never ended without a "happily ever after" sort of feel. Empire never provided that. The best you got was that nobody died but got horribly beat up. Return of the Jedi was my favorite as a child. It seemed to have all the action I ever wanted in a Star Wars movie. All the ship battles I could handle. All the lightsaber dueling I could absorb. All the blaster-fire I could process. It seemed like everything I ever wanted.
For years, I maintained that Return of the Jedi was my favorite of the franchise. I maintained that stance well into my adulthood. That's a lot longer than I should have let that slip. I was a fool. Now, I'm not saying that Return of the Jedi is the worst movie of the lot. But it's an inferior movie to the previous movies in the series. A couple of years ago, I watched Return of the Jedi and my mind was blown. I started noticing things I never paid attention to before. Why are the Ewoks suddenly so fucking annoying? Why does the dialogue seem so clunky? Why does it seem like it's giving me all the action I want and yet I feel nothing for the plot? Why are there suddenly so many new ships and devices we haven't seen before?
Oh fuck..........
This movie was trying to sell toys.
Lots of them.............
It became clear to me why all of this existed. It was all a big marketing ploy. The movie mattered less. I could see it in the way it was thrown together. I researched it on the internet to try to calm my paranoia. Instead, I just confirmed my fears. George Lucas and several of the producers and actors went on record stating that the purpose of the movie was to sell it more to kids. And god damnit, it worked like a charm. Clunky dialogue that requires very little understanding for a child. Teddy bears/mini-Chewbaccas being cute and fighting the Empire as comic relief. New ships. Cool weapons. More toys to sell. Sure, Darth Vader dies. But everyone else lives. No real plot points that make you turn your head. Everything happens the way my child brain wants it to. Lots of action. More understanding. Less plot. More shit that I want in toy form. The worst part is, it all worked. I was seriously heartbroken. Empire Strikes Back was the superior movie all along. Excellent plot. Intriguing character development. High stakes. Personal investment into the characters. Empire had it all. I would always scoff at people who would tell me Empire was their favorite movie and couldn't understand why that would be. The truth is, they were smarter than me. They saw that way before I did. They understood Return of the Jedi's failings. I could not. I was a product of marketing and childhood nostalgia. Star Wars felt cheapened and ruined. I can't watch Return of the Jedi the same way I did when I was a kid. I can't look at it the same. It hurts too much to remember how my mind was raped by marketing schemes.
If you think that hurts me, imagine how I felt when I truly figured out the newer Star Wars movies when they came out........
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