I hate it when people say "My adolescent years were hard for me." As if to imply their puberty-induced awkwardness was somehow more uniquely difficult. Join the freaking club! Just like everyone else, it was difficult for me as well. I was quiet and awkward around and girls my age. I wasn't well-liked among girls in my middle school for one reason or the other despite keeping quiet and intentionally staying out of the way. In my sophomore year of high school, that somewhat changed. My friend Damon dragged me to a dollar movie to see "The Ring." I didn't want to see the movie. It looked stupid and plotless. I would have rather wasted my money on gas for my car or new equipment for my drums. However, this dollar movie occasion was somewhat different. Damon promised girls he knew would be there and had managed to talk me up a little bit. This concept intrigued me. I had never been to a movie with a girl before. I was suspicious at first. I figured we might be getting used as a means for these girls to get into a movie for free. Who would want to go to a movie with me anyway? They must be after something. I quickly dismissed this notion upon realizing that going to a dollar movie with two girls wasn't exactly going to cause me to go broke. I decided to go but was still wary. Who were these girls? How did they know Damon? What did he tell them about me? And how the hell did I get dragged into this again? Curiousity, I guess. Maybe this could lead to something...... A girl liking me, perhaps? Nah...... Implausible! I was admittedly nervous but didn't fret too much. Damon got nicely dressed with a button-up shirt and cologne. I put on an old skater hoody and called it good. I looked in the mirror to make sure I didn't look like a total hobo. I had grown out my hair to super shaggy lengths again. I knew I didn't look good, but I didn't care since I expected no girl would like me anyway. All I cared about was skateboarding, music and friends. This time was slightly different. I didn't care exactly how I dressed, but I tried to look a little nicer than usual. I tried to make sure my hair looked a little more uniform rather than completely scraggly as if I just woke up. That's about as far as it went. I wasn't expecting much out of this other than getting the experience of having to deal with a girl outside of school on a social basis.
I was the only one with access to a car and a license. It was the curse of turning 16 long before everyone else. The girls apparently didn't have a car either. Now the task of going to pick them was now in my awkward hands. Shit. What's the protocol for this sort of thing? Do I go to the door? Do I wait for them to come outside? I didn't want to deal with it. I looked to Damon for advice who remained positive and tried to give me pointers on what to say. I didn't actually ask for his help, he just willingly gave it, perhaps sensing my nervousness. Or he just knew from nine years of friendship that I had absolutely no experience in dealing with girls except from online chatrooms. I was relieved he was giving me pointers, but I pretended like I didn't need them. I was cool, right? Damon was a heavy-set but confident kid. He was chatting up girls on a professional level when we were just in elementary school; while I played basketball, drew pictures about Star Wars, and went on long walks around the playground by myself. He had a long head start. This wasn't his first rodeo. I was glad he was there, but somewhat annoyed by his condescending presence. He was the confident master and I was the naive pupil. His advice was nice to have but he relished that he knew this subject way better than me. He made it a point to make that known in his own little way. He was a good friend, but he was always very competitive. He had no problem letting me know where I stood compared to him in other subjects. Despite his passive aggressive competitiveness, I was still glad he was there. My little annoyances will have to be set aside if I am to learn what he knows.
I wouldn't go to the door to pick up the girls. What if the dad was scary? He would take one look at me and be like "You're not actually here to pick up my daughter, are you? Because there is no way in hell you are taking her to a movie you filthy hippy." Turns out, this girl's father was not present in her life. I still refused to go to the door anyway. I sent Damon out instead, who rolled his eyes and laughed. It was dark by this time. The bright porch light made him into a detail-less silhoullete. I saw two small female figures emerge in the doorway. I couldn't see them well but I hoped they were good looking. If they were good looking, then I would have something to talk about as far as girls went. My other friends were already dating and giving me crap for not dating. I could picture it now: Kyle would give me a high five and say something like "Finally, Johnny is dating hot chicks." Whereas Branden would say some dick comment that would actually mean a compliment in his language like "About time you fuckin' weird-ass loser." Yes, the glory would be mine! No more just talking about girls who were hot and marveled at from a distance. I could be going on a date with a potential hot girl right now. I could finally speak from experience like my other friends. But what if they were ugly and weird? Well that's easy, I could just blame Damon later on for setting me up for disaster. "It was his idea!" I would say in my defense. "At least it was a date," I would then digress casually. It was perfect. I had a way in or out either way!
The two girls got in the backseat of my car, while Damon sat in the front seat with a smug smile on his face. I didn't dare look back. "Stay cool, be casual," I reassured myself in my head. Damon looked in the back seat and said "This quiet guy here is my friend, Johnny. Why don't you girls say hi and thank him for taking us to our destination?" The girls giggled and said thanks. I still didn't look back. I managed to mumble a weak "You're welcome." I put the car in drive and drove towards the theatre. The girls introduced themselves but I didn't pay attention to what their names were. I was too consumed in my nervousness to care. The movie theatre was only two minutes away from their house. We could have walked there if we wanted. "I can't believe I'm wasting gas on this. I need this gas for other things," I thought. I couldn't think of what those other things were, but I was convinced this car trip that totaled 8 minutes was a waste of my personal resources. Damon and the girls bantered about various subjects during the short trip. They sounded nice. But I still hadn't actually seen them. I tried to sneakily look in my rearview mirror to see if I could catch a glimpse of their faces. It was too dark to see them. The only thing I was able to know for sure is that one was blonde and the other might have had freckles. I stayed silent and concentrated on driving. Maybe if I looked like I was concentrating on driving, I wouldn't have to talk. It would be the perfect excuse for my awkward silence.
I got more nervous as we parked in the theatre parking lot. I didn't anticipate being this nervous. This wasn't supposed to be a big deal! Now I have to look at them and make conversation. What if I say something stupid? What if I don't say anything at all and look stupid for that too? What if I trip and fall? What if one of them asks me questions? I am NOT prepared for this!
No comments:
Post a Comment