The Men My Child-Self Wanted Me To Be When I "Grew Up"

My mom has been looking through old pictures of family for the upcoming family reunion in New Mexico. She has found many memories I have long forgot about. The ones that struck me the most were the ones of when I was in elementary school. Every grade seemed to have an assignment about what we wanted to be when we grew up. Most kids are never sure on what they want to be. It was funny to see the things that I wanted to be. By today's standards, I would never be able to do half the jobs I wanted.

Here is a sampling of a few of the jobs I wanted as a kid.

An Olympic Gymnast
This notion is so absurd that I laughed when I saw that on the paper. I was obsessed with Star Wars as a kid and wanted to do all the cool flips that Luke Skywalker could. I was jealous. Me being a gymnast now is insane. I'm so clumsy I would likely have accidentally killed myself in the first week of gymnastics class. Plus the whole flexibility thing. Yeah........

A Police Officer
I have nothing but the greatest respect for the men and women in law enforcement. They do a tough job for the greater good of our population and are still seen as "the bad guy" by most people. However, I could never do their job. I don't have the mettle to kick that kind of ass. I'm probably one of the least intimidating people out there. I'm short and fairly young looking. Criminals would have a hard time resisting the urge to kick my ass just for fun.

A Cartoon Writer
This meant I would have to learn how to draw. When I was six, I thought I was excellent at drawing. When I was 8, I realized I sucked at it. I had a desire to learn how to draw. I was jealous of my friends who could draw really well at a young age. They knew how to make something look kind of 3D. I could barely master the concept of the stick figure. This all stemmed from my great love for cartoons. It wasn't until high school where I briefly considered becoming a cartoon writer in a different sense: writing scripts and story lines. That dream quickly died.

NBA Basketball Player
I think every boy who was involved with sports fantasized frequently about being on a professional team. My friend David and I played basketball non-stop till middle school's end. I wasn't great at basketball. But I was pretty good according to my coaches. I started on every team I played. But I failed to get on the middle school team and realized I was mediocre on the offense. I also realized how competitive I was. Not against other people but against myself. I'm the one who brought me down every time I messed up. I wasn't competitive against other people so much. But when people got cocky competitive against me, I hated the game. It frustrated me so badly. I soon came to hate sports because of those people. I was ok being hard on myself because I still enjoyed the game. But the second I started playing with cocky, shit talking douchebags, that's when I hated the game. It was no longer fun to play because of people like that.

A Pilot
The last half of elementary school, I was obsessed with flying a plane. I liked military stuff. I had dreams of joining the army or the air force flying sweet fighter jets. My dad was supportive of this notion but also knew I was terrible at math. He would tell me, "That's great you want to be a pilot, but remember it takes a lot of math. If you master math, you can be a pilot." After hearing that a few dozen times, I too realized my stunning handicap at math. My dreams of flying were shattered by my retardation of mathematics. A part of me thinks that maybe some day, way down the road, I can get my private pilot's license. A day when I'm done with school and successful. It's probably for the better that I'm not flying multi-million dollar jet liners with hundreds of people on board. Really.

Military Officer
I had considered the marines in early high school. I didn't care for school and did mediocre to poorly in my classes during those years. I cared about nothing. The notion of combat was appealing to me. The notion of being in charge of people was much more appealing. There was 3 times where I had almost signed up for the army, marines or navy. I didn't go through with it. I had this thing about dying.......Yeah. Didn't want to die. So I scrapped that idea.

Rock Star!
In high 9th grade I started to learn how to play the drums. I loved it. I soon formed my own band that lasted for 4 years. That was an amazing part of my life. School suffered as a result. We had a pretty good amount of success with the band. Like everyone else who forms a band, everyone almost immediately has grandiose dreams of being signed on a big label, going on tour, and meeting a ton of chicks. Sweet! The band broke up near the end of my senior year. My dreams were shattered but my spirit not yet broken. For two years I was a fill in temporary drummer for sever bands and worked at the music shop local. I had a brief ideal of being a music producer but realized how crazy that was and my low likelihood of success.

How I got to the point I am now, is a completely long and boring story. Maybe a different blog will be made about that. And I'm sure I've forgotten about many other careers I thought I could do. If I think of any, I will be sure to post them.