Currently, I'm taking a break from writing a terrible final paper. I just had to write something different than contrasting the ideas of two different philosophers. Barf.
So instead, I will tell you about my terrible eating habits. Since about my birthday last month, I have been eating terrible shit. The stress of the holidays and finals have caught up with me. I always eat like shit during finals. In fact, today I had breakfast from McDonald's, 2 donuts from 7-Eleven (working on my third and have a danish as a back up for later on), and 2 cups of coffee. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "Gee golly whiz, Johnny! How is that you can eat so much terrible food but still find time to do homework and write a blog without having shit your pants repeatedly?" My thoughts exactly. My superhero-esque colon has the super power of food and fecal retention despite the presence of McDonalds lurking somewhere in my digestive system.
Don't be jealous.
I'm not sure what the back story is to my super-colon but I'm sure it has something to do with being exposed to radiation during my seemingly uneventful birth. Though, I'm admittedly disappointed that my probable radiation exposure didn't do something better for me, like give me super intelligent powers or help me grow an unnecessary limb in an illogical part of my body.
Oh well, I'll take it. My super-colon and I will be taking this show on the road soon. Feed me whatever you want. Beto's. Taco Bell. Applebee's. You name it. My pants will be 100% clean 24 hours post-ingestion of these known laxatives.
Yes, I know. Poop jokes.......... I really am running out of good material to write about.
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